When was the last time you felt light?
When was the last time you felt loose?
When was the last time you played?
As adults, we tend to see that which brought us joy in our adolescence as juvenile. As an immature joy. We associate whatever pleasure that evolved during that period with being young, & because of that, we define it as trivial.
We file away things like coloring, playing video games, going for a walk, dancing, or listening to music, as a time suck. We discount its value. We assess its usefulness based on tangible life application & output results. Meaning, if we can’t monetize it or prove it’s value to others, we throw it out. We barter with it by putting it at odds with whatever seems to be more important & define better ‘adult’ uses of our energy, focus, and time.
We identify indulging in heady, fantastical, or free-flowing behavior, as childish or underdeveloped because of it’s origin & ROI. We age-shame ourselves, refute genuine delights, and because of that, not only brush aside what brings us joy, but also joy itself.
Think about it…
How many times have you deprioritized joy for work?
How many times have you devalued play?
How many times have you convinced yourself that joy & play are for kids?
That adulthood is the process of growing to outgrow prioritizing magic, imagination, & leisure as a NEED?
How many times have you tried to convince yourself that your wants AREN’T needs?
When we deny ourselves that which gives us pleasure, we IGNORE our joy. We don’t refute the fact that we’re aware bliss exists. Rather, in choosing to ignore our joy we confirm that we know what brings it to us. We acknowledge that it does exist, but entertain the notion that it (i.e. joy, want, pleasure, need, play, etc.) is not for us.
We tell it that it must be only for them. We tell it that there is no room or time for it in our lives. We forbid ourselves the freedom to trust what is good & makes us feel inside ourselves. We neglect the internal *ping* that says, this feels good or is worth a try! We demonize the truth screaming I do or do not care about this, I need or want that, I relate or not that person, place, or thing.
To it, we say, “I am not worth taking time to laugh, dance, or create with.” “I’m not allowed to think or feel that way.” “Doing this is more important than that.” Instead, we decide that we’re adults & label it as unnecessary, child’s play, kid shit, showy, naive, or a waste of time. We say, “There is no play or joy for you.” And, if there is, it must occur if or when there is an appropriate amount of discretionary time for it.
If this thinking resonates with you or you hear a voice within whispering, “Yes” to any piece or part of this, I invite you to see what’s up?
What is your resistance to play and joy about?
What relationship are you actively in with your joy?
Are you in an active and committed relationship to it?
On a scale of 1-10, what level of importance is honoring your wants/needs?
Just because we are in a pandemic & worldwide shut-in, doesn’t mean our wants, play, & joy has to be shutdown. It doesn’t mean that while we’re being mindful of ourselves & each other, that there isn’t room in our consideration for living, merrymaking, & enjoyment.
Remember: Awareness is not about shaming yourself for creating it. It’s about opening-up to know you better, so as to make being who you are less of a problem & more of a compassionate and self-responsible choice.
Be Good to Yourself for Fuck’s Sake!